I'll start with my second public service announcement:
*I want to thank the people who read my last post, and offered words of advice. Anita asked if I felt better after writing it, and I have to say noooooo! I know, right?!?! It's because I still edited the crap out of it. Had I not, it would have been ugly. See, I tried to lay out the facts, organize and analyze them. You know, make it productive. Had I truly vented... well, my venting isn't productive. I learned from a childhood of being surrounded by people constantly fighting, both verbally and physically, that words cannot be taken back. Especially when written. It's a good lesson, but I tend to bottle up, which makes a perhaps typical situation way larger, because it builds like a carbonated drink bottle being shaken. My goal is to analyze, and then try to discuss calmly. Unfortunately, at times, I am still not "heard," then that bottle pops open, and all kinds of stuff spews out. This is why I don't put this stuff under lock and key. First of all, this is an outlet. The people who surround me in my daily life, good friends, acquaintances... don't know I do this, and I don't feel free enough to discuss my problems with them. So if they did know about my blog, I wouldn't feel as free to write whatever I feel. Most of them I know, don't even read blogs on sites like this. Second, there are people out there who go through the same things or worse. I read it... and I am so thankful to have them, because it puts things in perspective for me. SO when I tell the wife, "This is absolutely normal behavior for these kids right now...," I have proof, and when she tells her friends about it, they tell her it's normal too. One of them even said it's better than doing these things in real time. That being said, this doesn't mean it's okay, and that we can just let it go.
In my last post, I mentioned a senior prank gone bad. I have to say, that as a parent of two kids who really aren't all that social, I was excited that the girl was participating in something quite "normal." As a teen I did some pretty ridiculous stuff with my friends. I remember taking letters off of those marquee signs, changing the words around, or sneaking into cemeteries, abandoned buildings, and onto golf courses, and toilet-papering houses. Each time we did these things, we gained some great memories, and learned some lessons, that we still laugh about today.
So when the girl told us they were doing a senior prank, we were okay with it. It's something the adults expect. Apparently, the adults did not expect this. The kids attend a small, private school. Everyone is very close... it's like family. The headmaster and his wife have sleepovers/study groups in their home, have school lock-in's, discuss relationship issues, and everything else with the kids, and participated in last years senior prank.
This year was a little different. The kids did not include the headmasters wife in the planning of the prank. They did it on their own. They decided to break into the school, and remove every piece of furniture from two classrooms. They then tiled the floors of the classrooms with books, put vaseline on the doorknobs, and moved a valuable statue into another teacher's classroom. They left a message "Love your senior class of 2012." So, yes... this was a very serious prank, because it was breaking and entering. The message they left though, said to me, and some of the other parents "Hey, we're comfortable enough here to do this type of thing... it wasn't an act committed out of malice." Regardless, they got into SO much trouble!
One of their punishments was 50 hours of community service to be done for the school. This means that even though the girl doesn't have a first or last class anymore, she still needs to be there, doing odd jobs. It also meant working the school garage sale this morning. She had to be there at 5:45 am. Ugh! To me, that's punishment.
I was awake at 5 this morning listening for her, to be sure she was up. I never heard a sound, but kept telling myself I'm not going to get her up. This is a good lesson in responsibility... so I eventually fell back to sleep. I woke up at 8, and wandered around the house for a good 30 minutes before I finally decided to check the garage. I was just so sure she hadn't made it up, and tonight is prom. What if they don't let her go because she didn't show up for the sale?!?! I opened the door, peeked around the corner, and the car was gone... yay!! She did it! See, it's the little things. I don't know, maybe she will be responsible in a job. I mean, just because she doesn't do her chores around here, and just because she doesn't listen to us at all when it comes to life advice, doesn't mean she won't hit the world running. She'll have people to impress... she just doesn't feel the need to impress us. I get that... so we shall see.
Anyway... like I said, prom is tonight. This has been a nerve-wracking event to plan for. It makes me dread a future wedding, but hopefully that won't come for at least 12 years. Right?
Time for me to go... too many things to do today. I hope you all have a great Saturday!
*I want to thank the people who read my last post, and offered words of advice. Anita asked if I felt better after writing it, and I have to say noooooo! I know, right?!?! It's because I still edited the crap out of it. Had I not, it would have been ugly. See, I tried to lay out the facts, organize and analyze them. You know, make it productive. Had I truly vented... well, my venting isn't productive. I learned from a childhood of being surrounded by people constantly fighting, both verbally and physically, that words cannot be taken back. Especially when written. It's a good lesson, but I tend to bottle up, which makes a perhaps typical situation way larger, because it builds like a carbonated drink bottle being shaken. My goal is to analyze, and then try to discuss calmly. Unfortunately, at times, I am still not "heard," then that bottle pops open, and all kinds of stuff spews out. This is why I don't put this stuff under lock and key. First of all, this is an outlet. The people who surround me in my daily life, good friends, acquaintances... don't know I do this, and I don't feel free enough to discuss my problems with them. So if they did know about my blog, I wouldn't feel as free to write whatever I feel. Most of them I know, don't even read blogs on sites like this. Second, there are people out there who go through the same things or worse. I read it... and I am so thankful to have them, because it puts things in perspective for me. SO when I tell the wife, "This is absolutely normal behavior for these kids right now...," I have proof, and when she tells her friends about it, they tell her it's normal too. One of them even said it's better than doing these things in real time. That being said, this doesn't mean it's okay, and that we can just let it go.
Now for positive stuff!!
In my last post, I mentioned a senior prank gone bad. I have to say, that as a parent of two kids who really aren't all that social, I was excited that the girl was participating in something quite "normal." As a teen I did some pretty ridiculous stuff with my friends. I remember taking letters off of those marquee signs, changing the words around, or sneaking into cemeteries, abandoned buildings, and onto golf courses, and toilet-papering houses. Each time we did these things, we gained some great memories, and learned some lessons, that we still laugh about today.
So when the girl told us they were doing a senior prank, we were okay with it. It's something the adults expect. Apparently, the adults did not expect this. The kids attend a small, private school. Everyone is very close... it's like family. The headmaster and his wife have sleepovers/study groups in their home, have school lock-in's, discuss relationship issues, and everything else with the kids, and participated in last years senior prank.
This year was a little different. The kids did not include the headmasters wife in the planning of the prank. They did it on their own. They decided to break into the school, and remove every piece of furniture from two classrooms. They then tiled the floors of the classrooms with books, put vaseline on the doorknobs, and moved a valuable statue into another teacher's classroom. They left a message "Love your senior class of 2012." So, yes... this was a very serious prank, because it was breaking and entering. The message they left though, said to me, and some of the other parents "Hey, we're comfortable enough here to do this type of thing... it wasn't an act committed out of malice." Regardless, they got into SO much trouble!
One of their punishments was 50 hours of community service to be done for the school. This means that even though the girl doesn't have a first or last class anymore, she still needs to be there, doing odd jobs. It also meant working the school garage sale this morning. She had to be there at 5:45 am. Ugh! To me, that's punishment.
I was awake at 5 this morning listening for her, to be sure she was up. I never heard a sound, but kept telling myself I'm not going to get her up. This is a good lesson in responsibility... so I eventually fell back to sleep. I woke up at 8, and wandered around the house for a good 30 minutes before I finally decided to check the garage. I was just so sure she hadn't made it up, and tonight is prom. What if they don't let her go because she didn't show up for the sale?!?! I opened the door, peeked around the corner, and the car was gone... yay!! She did it! See, it's the little things. I don't know, maybe she will be responsible in a job. I mean, just because she doesn't do her chores around here, and just because she doesn't listen to us at all when it comes to life advice, doesn't mean she won't hit the world running. She'll have people to impress... she just doesn't feel the need to impress us. I get that... so we shall see.
Anyway... like I said, prom is tonight. This has been a nerve-wracking event to plan for. It makes me dread a future wedding, but hopefully that won't come for at least 12 years. Right?
Time for me to go... too many things to do today. I hope you all have a great Saturday!
2 comments:
Well, this sounds a bit better than the last post. But I'm still concerned.
Did she really go to the garage sale, or did she just take off?
More blessings and Bear hugs.
Regarding your PSA, I think you're brave to semi-vent on the blog, although that's what blogging is about - being able to express freely whatever we want to.
I hold back because my blog is known about by friends and family, and it is meant to be. Of course, I can start another to semi or fully vent, and can make it anonymous, but I don't trust the system. I used to be a computer programmer, and I know that nothing is sacred on the web. Even if people are not blog readers, others are, and sometimes that 1 in 1000 occurence happens - the time when someone who does read blogs, comes upon your blog and makes a connection indirectly with you, and passes it along.
Three bloggers who I know have posted about these stories over the years; how they had to change the content of the blog or to shut it down because they were caught.
Now that I've said all of that and revealed my paranoia (lol), sometimes I feel that you WANT to be heard/caught; that if the family or whoever found this blog, that you might feel relief. Could I be on the right track?
I hope the prom preparation is going well. Take lots of pictures and make sure you're in some of them! Treasure this day of you and the girl having a bonding day. :)
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