What?!?!?!

Let me just start out by saying I do not own rights to any of the below featured pictures. I'll post a link to each site I've borrowed from, but I need these pictures to make a point. I hope I don't get into trouble... could I since I'm not claiming them as mine? I really have no idea. I can remove them and post pictures I took with my phone!

First of all:

I'm now hotter than Melissa Etheridge. Stick with me... this is going somewhere. Anyway, say it isn't so, right? The wife says she was never hot, but I disagree:

This picture is from this site : http://lyrics.wikia.com/Melissa_Etheridge

Then we have this picture:

This picture is from this site: http://www.feelny.net/371_Melissa-Etheridge/

This is my picture. I took it with my phone, at her concert, the last time she was here. Front row... her passion for what she does is amazing, and that alone makes her hot. 

When I first saw a picture of Melissa Etheridge (many moons ago), my mouth dropped, and the thought that went through my head was "Oh my Hell, that's it, I am officially gay now." It's true. 

I didn't go looking for the year those top pictures were taken, but I can tell you, they weren't recent. 

This is how I described my thought process to a friend while we were discussing Madonna:

Sure I like  Madonna, I mean we grew up with her, right? Singing songs that made good Christians cringe, such as "Like a Virgin." 

Back then Madonna was hot (not hot "like that", I was a baby, but I sure wanted to look like her!!)

I was not hot... I was cute.

Then I hit my 20's... Madonna was still hot. I was hot. Though not as hot as Madonna.

30's: I was really hot in my 30's. The best shape I've ever been in... 6 pack and all! Madonna was still hot. 

40's: I'm cute... like a freakin' little puppy. Madonna... is still hot. 

It's a little sickening. 

So, on one of my "I just want to stay in this bed forever, and eat HoHo's" days, I was flipping through a People Magazine, and saw a picture of Melissa Etheridge, her ex, and their twins. I really had to look closely because I was shocked. Thats Melissa Etheridge?? No way!! Oh my God, she's like normal people. She's aging, and wearing "mommy" clothes, and looking a bit stressed. Her hair is overgrown with no style what so ever... hey, a normal person!!

She was not plastering a sh*t eating grin on her face. I say that because her ex said they were doing that for the sake of the kids. Just a side note here... I don't like her ex (not that I know her personally). I think she may be a little nuts. It's important to know that when you're bitter, it's probably not a good idea to make it so very public, because eventually you end up looking like the bad guy, even if you aren't. 

I did boycott Melissa Etheridge for a short time because of their breakup. I mean, how could she leave someone who stood by her side in sickness and health? I did finally figure out the real reason I was so upset by this breakup, though. It was because of the songs she wrote, supposedly for her wife (at the time). Like, "I've Loved You Before." I love that song. To have someone write something so amazingly beautiful for you... wow. So, the upset comes from the fact that she probably did feel this deep love, but then she didn't. That's scary for anyone who is in a relationship to realize. We all know this is possible, but it's a slap in the face when you're faced with the fact that life truly is not a fairy tale... for anyone. Again, she's a normal person.

Back to my day in bed:

I saw this picture...

 http://www.tmz.com/2012/01/20/melissa-etheridge-and-ex-tammy-lynn-michaels-kids/#.TzL3FZgqPjA

and I thought "Oh my Hell, I think I may be hotter than Melissa Etheridge!

I mean look at me and my rock star self...

Yeah, ignore the tongue. 

Oh and now for the beach pose...

No swim suit pictures... the beautiful wife would not be happy with that!! 

So there you go... the epiphany went from "Oh my Hell, I'm gay," to "Oh my Hell, I think I'm hotter!"

For the time being. She'll go on tour again, make herself all hot again, get up there, sing, and again my mouth will fall open in awe... Awe over my lovely wife, who will be by my side, hopefully in the front row again, because she knows that no matter how hot Melissa Ehteridge will be, with all of that passionate singing... the wife is the only one for me!! 

The real point is this... No matter how much we have or don't have we all go through stages in life. Stages of good health, bad health, happiness, sadness, hurt, joy, bitchiness... well, it's true. The grass is always greener, and more exciting when you aren't having to tend to it on a daily basis, etc etc, blah, blah, blah... 

Have a great night everyone. If you have time, go follow my temporary blog called 6 Weeks of Health. I still have much to do on it. I want to figure out how to set up tabs, and such so I can offer recipes and other interesting things I find and know. Hey, I'm a real person trying to get fit... it will be fun! Plus those posts will never be as long as these!!