I had to go into the kids' school today to enroll the boy for another year. The girl is graduating this year (OH yes... I have a college bound teen), so it will just be the boy for the next four years.
I was in the office filling out the paperwork, though not nearly as much as last year, because he is a returning student. I loved that, but the woman doing my paperwork this year, was different from the one who did it last year. She knows me when I come in, says hi, calls me by my name, etc, etc.
I guess this is why she was somewhat confused. She said, "Can I ask who this is?" Pointing to the other name, I looked down, looked back up at her and said, in the best offhanded way I could muster, "That's my partner." Last year, I said "That's the kids' step-mother." That statement flustered the woman last year, way more than what I said this year, to the new woman I was dealing with. Then I screwed up my new year goal of being proud of who we are, and what we have, by adding "But, we don't tell people that." I'm not really sure why I added that, except that I didn't want her to get all excited and start bombarding everyone with this newly acquired information, that probably confirmed a suspicion they've all had anyway. Though the wife and I attend the events, and volunteer, we have more contact with the kids rather than the adults. This is why she wouldn't have known the wife. Anyway, back to why I made that statement to her.You must remember: small town/small private school. The kids have always been great with their life, but this year, the girl has been more self-conscious. Remember some of the kids pray at lunch. Some are very religious.::sigh::
I don't like that the girl views a person's faith as being an obstacle, as far as accepting that we are all different. An obstacle that prevents you from unconditionally loving your fellow human beings. I can't change that for her, because sadly, history, and the daily news, prove her right. It's very hard to raise your child to love God, without seeming like a hypocrite, but in all honesty, who is the hypocrite? The person who beats down those who are different, and tells them God hates them, or the person who loves God unconditionally, and knows in their heart, that God isn't hateful, and that God even loves the person who feels righteous enough to speak for Him in such hateful and judgmental ways.
The boy doesn't believe anything at all. I take some blame for that, due to my own negativity toward religion. It took me some years to realize, I needed to fear the followers of God, and not God himself. The boy is a very literal person though, and needs strong facts. When he was younger, I had to tell him he wouldn't get presents from Santa Claus if he didn't believe in him. I mean, Santa brought the best presents! He still says he believes, just to amuse me. I obviously can't do that as far as God, but I hope for happiness and peace in his life, and that he will eventually believe in something... perhaps himself! That would be a wonderful place to start.
Eh, enough of this talk. I'll tell you it's a regular soap opera at their sporting events. The exes come and sit as far away form each other as possible, with stone-faced expressions. I think they should do pat-downs before they allow us into the sporting events, just in case someone is feeling extra crazy that day. At least when the kids' dad comes, we all sit together and talk. Hell, life is too short to "hate..." anyone!!
How about you guys... does the word "hate" exist in your vocabulary? I read an article on "haters" recently. For all I know, I may have already blogged about it, and quoted it (by the way, I'm always so impressed with those bloggers who can bring up a topic, and then link you to a previous blog, maybe from years ago, which relates to what they are now posting). Anyway, I loved the last sentence of this story. It was asking "What ever happened to the words "I don't like?" Hate is a strong word, and you must understand the consequences of the words you speak, because someone is always listening.
I'm guilty... "I hate traffic!" "I hate people." Oh yes, this is my favorite one. Let's just say, as social as I am, and as much a I love people, I also have a strong dislike for some people in general, due to their inconsiderate ways, thoughtlessness, lack of compassion, empathy, sympathy, and for "hating" me when they don't even know me. I once told the wife (this is in another blog, that I cannot even possibly link you back to), that I would love the superpower of blinking some people off of the face of the earth. It wouldn't hurt them, they would just go poof, to another existence, in which I would not have to suffer their brutal ways. Especially in traffic!!
No one should take this personally... I'm a lover, not a fighter. I just have a bit of a fight in me once in awhile, when I'm "riled" as the wife puts it, and right now I'm "riled." Four more years... I hope they will grow to love us in that time. It's unfortunate I'm the kind of person who feels the need to be accepted by all. How about that? Anyone have any input on that? Am I the only one who is crazy like that. Crazy, because my age dictates that I should know better.
Okay... time for me to go! I've a lot to do. The morning is gone, and I can't let the afternoon get away from me too! Have a safe, wonderful Friday 13th, 2012!!